Psalm 119:9~Guarding Your Way With the Word

Is there any segment of society more notorious for their sins than young men? They are often headstrong and willful. Rarely can they see the downstream effects of their actions. They fail to listen carefully to advice thus making foolish and ignorant choices. The psalmist knows this. In fact, he was probably a young man himself. Psalm 119:9-16 begins with something that sounds like a word of despair:

How can a young man cleanse his way?

Or as the ESV says:

How can a young man keep his way pure? 

"Lord, I am a young man. The world is filled with pits and dangers. My heart is filled with sin. There are lusts that wage war on my soul. There are temptations to greed, anger, bitterness, lust, and disrespect all around and I give in to them too often. Lord, how can I stay clean in a world like this with a heart like mine?"

Is that not a cry for help?

The word for "cleanse/pure" points to morally purity. Asaph uses it in Psalm 73:13 where it looks like the wicked are winning. He thinks he has been morally clean for no good reason. David pleads with God to cleanse him from his sins in Psalm 51:7. Here we see that the word does not just point to action, but also to our hearts. David is asking the Lord to clean his heart. Micah 6:11 says that those who cheat others out of money cannot be counted as "pure." In Psalm 119:9 the emphasis is on how we live, how we walk.

How can I live a pure life in the midst of this wicked world?

The first thing we should note is humans do not change, no matter how much time has passed. Young men in 600 B.C. are the same as young men in A.D. 2015.  Their hair may be different. They carry cell-phones instead of spears. They shop at Wal-Mart instead of hunting for antelope or growing corn. But inside nothing has changed. The temptation to sexual immorality is the same. The desire to get rich while being lazy has not changed. The tightening in the throat when they are told what to do by parents or employers has not changed. Therefore the Bible remains relevant at all times, in all places, and for all men because it is given by the one God who does not change to address the fundamental needs of mankind who does not change. Despite being over 2,500 years old Psalm 119:9 still speaks.

The answer to the young man's cry is simple. "Take heed/guard [his way] according to God's Word."  A young man is to watch his path and his heart. When he sees himself wandering from God’s Word he is to come back. His thoughts, deeds, words, and desires are to be fenced in by the Word of God. God's Word keeps us from heading down the path of destruction. 

We don't like this answer. We want something new. We want something magical. And let's be honest, we want something easy. But the path of holiness is obedience to God's revealed Word. It always has been and always will be.  The only way a young man can stay clean in this world is to read, study, memorize, and obey the Bible.  The Scriptures are the primary tool for sanctification. If you do not use this tool then you cannot expect victory. There are no short cuts around God's Word for righteous living. 

The psalmist is telling young men to watch out for "big" sins, such as sexual immorality. But he is talking about much more than that. A young man whose way is guarded by God's Word will be a man of prayer and repentance. He will be a man whose faith in God grows day by day. He will learn to sacrifice for those around him. He will put off temporary ease for long term gain. He will love his neighbor. He will protect the weak and cast down the proud. He will love to sit underneath God's Word every Sunday. He will treat women with respect. He will work hard and give generously. His close friends will be those who love Jesus. Be careful about thinking of a pure/clean life only in terms of sexual sin. It includes that of course, but there is much more to "cleansing our way" than avoiding porn. 

The battles young men fight with lust, anger, pride, laziness, disrespect, and apathy are not new battles. They are as old as Genesis 3.  The way to win these battles has always been the same; believe and obey God’s Word. Young men if you are losing the battle against sin you can be sure your failure to believe and obey God's Word is the main problem. Do you know the Word? Are you reading it regularly? Are you memorizing verses or passages? Do you humbly listen to your pastor every Sunday? God has given all you need to grow in holiness. Are you using what He has given?

Other Posts on Psalm 119
Psalm 119:2-4
Psalm 119:7

Gender is a Cage

George Gilder wrote the following paragraphs in 1986.

To the sexual liberal, gender is a cage. Behind cruel bars of custom and tradition, men and women for centuries have looked longingly across forbidden spaces at one another and yearned to be free of sexual roles. The men dream of nurturing and consoling; the women want to be tough and child free. Today it is widely believed that the dream of escape can come at last. 

This belief leads to a program of mixing the sexes in every possible way, at every stage of life. In nurseries and schools, in athletics and home economics, in sex education and social life, the sexes are thrown together in the continuing effort to create a unisex society. But the results are rarely as expected, and the policies are mostly founded on confusion.

Some of the confusions arise in the schools, where the androgynous agenda has made the greatest apparent headway and its effects can best be studied. It turns out what seems elemental to many expert educationists is actually bizarre from the long perspective of history and anthropology

Until recent years, for example, most American parochial schools have kept strict sexual segregation. The boys and girls joined chiefly on ceremonial occasions-assemblies and graduations. Even the playground was divided into male and female territories. The restrictions were lifted only during carefully supervised dances, when young couples made their way chastely around the floor of the gym under the watchful eyes of nuns. Any unseemly body contact brought a swift reprimand: "Leave six inches for the Holy Ghost."

There is no room for the Holy Ghost any longer at most of our schools. The bodies and minds rub together from kindergarten to graduate study. The result is perfectly predictable. Sexual activity occurs at an increasingly younger age. In communities where the family cannot  impose discipline, illegitimate children are common. Classrooms become an intensely sexual arena, where girls and boys perform for the attention of the other sex and where unintellectual males quickly come to view schoolbooks as a menace to manhood.

He closes the chapter with these words:

In the United States and Western Europe girls and boys are expected to traffic together intimately for years before they can marry. They are subjected to intense sexual distractions and competitions during the critical stages of their educations. They are brought up in a society where sex is continuously advertised and propagandized.

The result is that boys and girls are driven into periods of sexual experimentation and stress unparalleled in length or intensity by other societies. One aspect of sex is drastically downplayed, however, and that is the most important, fundamental, and sexually differentiated part-procreation. 

Thus the American system of increasingly far-reaching sexual integration vividly teaches the lesson that boys and girls are sexually similar and that sex is a matter of exchanging pleasures between them in a reciprocal way. This approach is inimical [hostile] to durable love and marriage. The boys do not learn to venerate the procreative powers of women, and the girls stunt their own consciousness of a more elaborate sexuality. Thus, in effect, despite the feminized regimen of many schools, in sex itself-the domain of women- masculine patterns prevail and both sexes are diminished.

The advocates of sexual integration, moreover, seem ready to stop at virtually nothing-not sex education classes, not sports, not even, so it seems, the ultimate male arena of military combat.

Stephen Clark in Man and Woman in Christ says that boys and girls spend more time together now than at any previous point in human history. What impact does that have on their emotional, physical, and spiritual development? Gilder's point throughout this chapter is that we have created an androgynous society where men and women are interchangeable and integrated across the board. They are educated in the same rooms and in the same way. They work in the same fields. They play on the same sports teams. They play the same sports. They both are encouraged to pursue careers. There is no incentive to marry, raise children, and establish a family. Men are not encouraged to provide because after all the wife (or lover or girlfriend or mom) can provide just as well. Women are not encouraged to use their young years to do the great work of  bearing children. Instead they are encouraged to spend the younger years pursuing money, status, and freedom. And of course, the men are happy to let them, as long they get an occasional favor.

Since Gilder wrote this things have only gotten worse. Can we tell boys and girls they are the same from daycare to graduate school and then expect boys to become men and girls to become women? Why are we shocked by Jenner, sodomy, lesbianism, and transgender bathrooms when for decades we have taught that men and women are interchangeable? The slow, steady obliteration of male and female is the goal of our society. This goal is fueled by a slow, steady rebellion against God. Unfortunately many churches and Christians have bought into it. Why do so many churches, denominations, and Christians raise their sons and daughters as if they are the same? Until we acknowledge that men and women are different and train our children that way we will continue to lose the battle on sexuality.

Dress, Manners, and the Created Order

Stephen Clark's book Man and Woman in Christ has been an excellent read. Near the end of the book he summarizes his conclusions from his study. One point is that Christians should use cultural expressions to express the role differences between men and women. Most societies throughout history, including Western society, have had ways of distinguishing between men and women and their roles. This was done in many ways, but primarily through different modes of dress and manners. Manners here would include what was done and said between men and women. An example my wife just read me was how in the Civil War South women did not discuss their pregnancies in front of men. When they became visibly pregnant they stopped going out into society as well. Whatever we think of the practice, it was a way of women distinguishing themselves from men.

In our society there has been a breakdown of differences between men and women. (That sentence is like saying the Titanic was a ship that sunk.) There are now coed bathrooms on many colleges, as well as coed dorm rooms. There are women firefighters, policemen, boxers, wrestlers, soldiers, pastors, and football players. Add to this the sexual confusion seen in sodomy, lesbianism, bisexuals, transgender, divorce, and abortion and we see a society that has lost any vision of the distinct, God-ordained differences between men and women. Therefore it is not a surprise that we have tossed aside cultural expressions of those differences. I want to briefly explore how we have done this in dress and manners.

Clothing for men and women has become more uniform. Can you imagine a store with male and female employees requiring their female employees to wear skirts? That thought experiment is enough to show how far we have come. Many movies depict women in pants and military style tank tops just like men wear. Men wear skinny jeans,which are basically yoga pants with buttons. There are clothes that are more feminine or more masculine. But our culture does not demand or expect that. For example, a girl could wear a nice dress to school, but she should just as easily wear a tank top, jeans, and tennis shoes. Her hair could be long or short. Feminine dress has become an individual expression instead of a cultural expectation and norm. Many women dress a certain way, not because they are women, but because it is an expression of their personal desires. That is why a woman can wear a nice dress to church, but go work a man's job, dressed like a man the rest of the week.

But the loss of manners, which distinguish men from women, is more pronounced that the uniformity of dress. Men used to open doors for women, give their seats up for women, wait for women, speak with careful respect to women, avoid certain topics when speaking with women, not lay their hands on women, etc. Men used to be cautious about what they said in front of the ladies. Now we talk to them just like they are one of the guys. Men and woman playing each other in sports would have been unthinkable. Now it is normal. We have completed flattened out the differences between men and women. Do we have any normal, social manners where we distinguish men from women?

There is no Biblical command that says, "Open doors for ladies." However, it is a cultural expression of a Biblical truth: Women and men are different and are to be treated differently. We don't have to necessarily hang on to opening doors for women. Here is the crux though. We have jettisoned our fathers' cultural expressions of role differences without replacing them with new ones. Therefore we are left with little non-verbal language by which we say, "Men and women are different."

There are many people, including some Christians, who do not think there is much of a difference between men and women. They are happy that these walls have been broken down. These people are in rebellion against the created order.

But for those of us who still think men and women were created by God for distinct roles, then cultural expressions of these differences are necessary. Here I offer two suggestions. Dress in a way that says, "I am a man." Or "I am a woman." I am not saying women can't wear pants or jeans. Nor am I saying that men must wear camo. But make sure your dress fits your sex. There is a lot of freedom here. I am not encouraging a return to all women or men wearing the same thing. I am encouraging men and women to wear clothes that distinguish them from the other sex.

Second, we should bring back distinct ways of treating the opposite sex. The men are primarily responsible for this. We should open doors for the ladies, wait to sit until they are seated, not speak of certain things in front of them, smoke our cigars outside, run late night errands instead of sending our wives into the night, rise when they enter the room, protect our ladies physically and spiritually. In short, we should find ways of saying, "Men are different from women." Ladies should let men do this. I find that many ladies hate having a man give up his seat for them. Why? We don't have to do all of these, but for Christians who think men and women are different we need to work at creating a cultural language that defies the egalitarian ethic that dominates the world we live in. It is not enough to preach from the pulpit or write in books that men and women are different. We must embody that truth in our homes, churches, and communities.

The King Who Washes Feet: Part II

The first part of this article can be found here. 

So What?

            What this passage means for us is easy to see, but hard to do. It means we do the dirty jobs that no one else wants to do. We change diapers and do dishes and vacuum and run to the store at 9 pm for the eggs that were forgotten. We volunteer at work for the job no one wants. As men, we love doing big things. If someone needs help building a shed, we will be there. Gutting a deer? Count me in.  Fixing a car engine? When do I show up? And of course, we should be willing to do the big things. God made us as men to strive for glory. Part of that glory is doing great things for those around us. But this passage teaches us that there is glory in the little things. Our struggle is not fighting off thieves who want to steal our goods. Our struggle is fighting off sleep to listen to our wife at 10 pm. Our struggle is coming home from a long day at work and putting the children to bed or cooking dinner for our roommate. Our struggle is being assigned the lame task at work that no one wants. Men, we cannot faithfully follow our Lord if we only do the great things and refuse to do the little things.   

            One good way to know if you are growing as a servant-leader is to ask this question: Am I willing to do a job that I will never be thanked for and no one will notice?  If you are always looking for praise and only do a job when someone is patting you on the back you are not serving like our Master.

What is He Doing Here?

            If you were Jesus would have let Judas eat the Last Supper? Would you have washed his feet? Imagine if you knew that someone was going to betray. In mere hours, this person would seek to destroy you for a few coins. Would you serve this person? Would you sit down and eat with them? Jesus did.

            Romans 12:17-21 tells us to be kind to our enemies and to bless those who persecute us. Christ gives us a wonderful picture of this truth. Judas had allowed the Devil some control over him (13:2). He had already agreed to betray Jesus Christ (Matthew 26:14-16).  And yet here is the One who set the stars in the heavens and commands legions of angels washing the feet of his betrayer.  In just a few hours Judas will kiss the cheek of Christ and seal the fate of both Lord and disciple.  Why does Jesus wash his feet?

            We must learn to serve those who hate us. Washing the feet of those we love is hard enough. But to wash the feet of our enemies requires grace beyond what we can find in our natural human hearts.  Only Christ can give us the grace to love those who stab us in the back.  Who is that enemy that you refuse to serve? Is there someone at work that you like to “stick it to?” Is there a family member that you refuse to serve because they slandered you in the past? If we are to be like Christ we must serve, not just those we love, but even those who hate us.

Blessed Are Those Who Do

            Finally, notice Jesus’ warning in verse 17.  We all tend to believe that because we have read something or studied something that we are doing it. But between knowing and doing there is often a deep chasm. Jesus reminds us here that knowledge is not enough. Memorizing the passage and studying it in depth is not a substitute for obedience. Only those who obey are blessed.

            But this is not just a warning. It is a promise. Jesus tells us that when we follow in his footsteps we will be blessed. Indeed, the only road to blessing is to follow after Christ. Men, if we want our homes and churches and communities to be blessed by Christ then we must refuse to glorify ourselves. We must put on the clothing of a slave and serve those around us.  We must be willing to do any task, no matter how small or trivial or low, to serve our wives, children, friends, neighbors, coworkers, and even our enemies. I asked earlier if we could imagine any of our heroes washing the feet of those around them. But now we must ask the question of ourselves. Could our family or friends or fellow church members imagine us washing their feet? If not, we should repent and follow after the example of our Master. 

The King Who Washes Feet: Part I

This is the first part of an article I wrote for our Men's Newsletter. I will post the second part tomorrow.       

Have you ever looked at your feet? I mean really looked at them. Have you sat down and examined them? Are your nails yellow? Are there callouses on the bottom? Do they have a distinct odor? Do you let your toenails get too long? Are your toes spread out or shoved up on top of each other? Does your heel feel like sandpaper?  Are there ugly veins all over them? Do they itch? Feet are generally not pleasant to behold, especially men’s feet.  But in John 13 those ugly feet provide one of the greatest symbols of Christian service. 

The Text: John 13:12-17

            Christ was just hours away from being nailed to the cross and bleeding for us when we reach John 13. It was Thursday evening. He was about to spend several hours teaching his disciples about the Holy Spirit, prayer, abiding in Him and how the world will hate them because it hated him (John 14-16). He will end the evening with a long prayer where he prayed for himself, for his disciples, and for us (John 17). Then the guards will come and carry him away to be crucified.

            But the night begins with an act that crystallizes who Jesus is.  Jesus has already entered Jerusalem on a donkey (12:14). He did not come in on a chariot or with a huge army or entourage. He came on a lowly donkey. Now he again chooses a humble action to show the disciples who he was and how they were supposed to imitate him. After the meal is over, Christ, the Messiah, takes off his robe and puts on a loincloth. He dresses himself like a slave. He then begins to wash the disciples’ feet.

            In those days, when men travelled on dusty roads and wore sandals, foot washing was an essential part of hospitality. When you entered someone’s house you took off your sandals and a servant would wash your feet. There are several other examples of foot washing in the Scriptures, including Luke 7:44 and I Timothy 6:10.  Foot washing was often done by the lowest member in the household. Christ chose to serve his disciples by washing their feet. 

            There is a lot more in this text than what I am going to draw your attention to. Verse 3 gives the reason for Christ’s service. He belonged to God and therefore did not need to grasp.  Also the exchange between Jesus and Peter (13:6-11) is theologically rich. I would love to discuss how Peter is clean, but still needs his feet washed.  But we will focus on verses 12-17. I would encourage you to read John 13:1-17 before reading the rest of the article.

What Kind of Lord?

            In these verses, Jesus is smashing down all worldly ideas about power and leadership. He is the Lord. He is their Teacher. He states that emphatically (vs. 13).  But he flips leadership on its head. We think leadership means I get to rule over you and tell you what to do and generally boss you around. But Jesus takes a sledge to this picture and in its place puts up a symbol of humble service.  We are sons of God. We are citizens in an Empire that will shine for eternity like a million burning suns. We are servants to the greatest King who ever lived. But this does not mean we get to rule over, it means we get to serve under.

            Can you imagine our president washing the feet of his cabinet? Can you imagine any great athlete washing their teammates’ feet?  What about James Bond? What about at your job, can you picture washing the feet of your fellow employees? Can we imagine our fathers washing the feet of those in our homes?

            Men, God has called us to lead in many areas. We will lead in our homes, at Christ Church, in our jobs, and in our communities. But this leadership is not leadership like the world.  We are not to imitate the brash, haughty, chest thumping men that parade themselves around, whether they are in sports or movies or politics. We are to imitate the leadership of the King of Kings. We are to wash the feet of those around us.